A Sea Change

A Sea Change

Upon the return of Chad and Rachelle, the day was drawing to a close, and the four spent only an hour or so, winding down, in preparation for bed.  Chad predictably wanted to give Dr. Bragg his package of cigars, and Jerry most wanted to delight Mrs. Malloy.  Rachelle chose to save hers as a peace offering for her dad, and it was natural to ask Julie whom wished to favor with her share. 

“I think I want to take mine to Dr. Busch, from my anatomy class.  He's hard to impress.”  Julie was completely unabashed, well knowing that she had never named Dr. Busch to Chad.  In fact, introducing Chad to the name might serve as a windward island to shelter her from a hurricane of wrath, when she eventually confessed. 

She had supposed that she and Rachelle would invariably work out some organized explanation, and she would have been horrified had she known of the interception of her message.  Furthermore, Rachelle had explained other things to Chad.  If she had known that Rachelle had told Chad about 'the look,' she would have been terrified.

Typical of humans, Julie took her own recent introduction to this intelligence for granted.  She had never faced Chad's riddle of the variable rate fuses, and so she didn't know how hard things can be to “figure out.”  Rather than attribute difficulty to Chad's observational task, she attributed superiority to her own intellect.  Her fallacious conclusion was that, since Chad was smarter than she was, he would simply “figure it out.”  In fact, Julie told herself, he ought to!  “If he doesn't, it's because he doesn't care about me, and he isn't really trying,” she thought.  She could not have been more wrong.

Meanwhile, so soon after Rachelle's shameless promotion of the respect a “man,” should enjoy, Julie's unreserved promotion of the BASTARD who got her pregnant enraged Chad.  Not only did the bastard get her pregnant, Chad thought, but he caused her to have an abortion!  This called for surpassing action, without moral or mental reservations.  Chad's jealousy would be implacable.

His decision about how to proceed was informed by Rachelle's explanation that Jerry was not “lazy in bed.”  Now that he knew that “some bruising is normal,” Chad no longer thought of Jules as unduly fragile.  He would be rigid in his person, and yield only when he had evidence of his thoroughness. 

As a bona fide nerd, Chad did not have Jerry's emotional temperance in his mettle.  In his studies, the killer instinct advocated no quarter, and his temper was not yet moderate in its extremes.  In matters of intellectual competition this was no deficiency, and he didn't yet know that in affairs of the heart, this virtuosity had no virtue; it was tyranny. 

They all retired, and Julie was affectionate.  This was mainly due to a backlash against her cousin's intellectual riding crop.  Jerry was SUCH an ass sometimes, she thought.  Chad was as smart as him, and Chad was sensitive.  Julie characteristically attached responsibility to her inquisitor.  She and Chad were still awkward when it came to the marital arts, but things progressed well nonetheless. 

Chad took his time, in some degree because of a detachment caused by anger.  His blood chemistry was confusing, as arousal mixed with anger.  He was positioned to have a revenge that few might ever enjoy, but Chad was not sufficiently acquainted with failure to fully appreciate it. 

He built up a head of steam, and Julie was surprised that this unstoppable engine was her own Chad.  She had learned to be an engineer for such a locomotive, and no shadow of concern shaded her guidance.  She had not yet wondered where he learned such resolve.  They reached their climaxes, and he did not neglect a strong finish. 

Julie lay there, delighted at this turn of events.  When Chad had been too forceful she had bent her knees, and ridden his abdomen like riding a horse at a canter.  He had no intention of injuring her.  His anger was sufficiently targeted on Dr. Busch, that force did not precipitate rape. His revenge would be reserved for an encore.

Julie was all unsuspecting when Chad adroitly turned her over.  He made an experiment of Rachelle's instructions, and quickly penetrated her with his fingers.  A moment to search, and his mission was successful.  She was still aroused, and squeezed cooperatively.  She could not believe what he did next.  Her cry of pain was real, as Chad scratched her deeply.  “Chad!” she squealed, “What did you DO?”

Chad had learned more than an action from Rachelle.  He had noted how to make it hurt.  “There,” he growled mercilessly.  “NOW you're not a virgin!”  For Chad, this was catharsis.  He had vented his spleen, and he was not solicitous.  He retired to the shower, leaving Julie to coil up in the fetal position. 

Julie was experiencing a different catharsis.  Chad had intended to goad her, by mirroring the heartless Mark, but instead, Julie's soul clung to the same redemption she had conjured when she had so betrayed Chad the first time.  She unquestioningly concluded that Chad spoke truth.  If this made her “not a virgin anymore,” then Chad, and not Dr. Busch had taken her virginity.  The guilty aching in her soul had been echoed by actual physical pain, inflicted by Chad, and she could now forgive herself.  Chad had unintentionally said the very thing to free her from self loathing.  Mark had accomplished a dependency that could be crippling.  Chad had accomplished not dominance, but conquest.

Her first words on Chad's return were revealing.  “How did you know?” she asked, without embellishment. 

Chad was determined to be a graceful victor.  “Jerry and I really did know how to defeat the secret message exchange,” he explained.

Julie was completely nonplussed.  Her eyes searched Chad's visage like a pioneer peering into the distance, devoid of comprehension.  “What do you mean?”

Chad was being direct enough.  “That's how I knew you fucked Dr. Busch.  What did YOU mean?”

“I meant about my... you know?”  At first confounded that Chad knew about Dr. Busch, a mystified Julie adjusted to context apprehensively.

Chad perceived that there were two subjects under discussion, Her affair with Dr. Busch, but also his scratch.  He did not beat about the bush.  “Rachelle told me.”

Here, he nearly undid all of the efforts Jerry and Rachelle had heaped upon them both.  In the final analysis, the fates are not gods, and serendipity is rare.  However, Chad failed to enumerate the causes that impelled his heartless comment, and Julie assumed higher motives than he possessed.  She emotionally surrounded doubt, like an oyster surrounds a grain of sand.  Moments passed in silence as it seeped into her brain that Chad had known MUCH more than she had intended him to.  “Do you hate me?” she finally asked. 

Having no prepared comment, Chad referenced the truth.  “No, but I'll NEVER trust you.”  It was brutally honest.  However, Julie knew a thing or two about men, and love is blind. 

“Do you love me?” she strategically returned.

Chad regarded her steadily. “Yes.  That's the only reason I was sooo mad at you for betraying me!  I thought you were BETTER than that.”

Like a matched pair of Morgan's, they had differing advantages.  In truth, Julie had loved Chad first, and the blind gratitude she felt when he chose her, would let him hold sway over her.  His ability to hurt her would always exceed her ability to hurt him.  But she could injure his pride simply by yielding to a wandering eye.  As long as he stayed with HER, it was she who retained the initiative in their war between the sexes.